Suggested by Miko

Are there any particular worlds in books where you’d like to live?

Yes, books for me are a great way of escaping to other times and places, not all places I'd like to live, but there are certainly some I'd like too.  I've mentioned before that it would be nice to live in Wodehouse world, it's such a great idea of England, with your club, your valet, stately homes, etc, and the biggest problems you find are getting engaged to to many women.  Brilliant.  Tolstoy's War and Peace is also one that would be livable in, but this is possibly down to the broad range of society he paints in the book, he really builds up a whole scene and emmerses you in character's lives.  Also Anthony Hope's Ruritania in Prisoner of Zenda, you have all the classic ingredients, chivalry, castles, real villains, princesses in need of rescue.  Clearly that is a world I'd enjoy!

Or where you certainly would NOT want to live?

I'd not want to live in the Paris of Les Miserables, it can't have been a nice age to live in, nor for that matter is most of Hemmingway world, such as the Italian front in A Farewell to Arms.

What about authors? If you were a character, who would you trust to write your life?

Interesting question.  Maybe Robert Louis Stevenson, he really couldn't resist adventure and he didn't over analyse characters, so by the time he'd finished my life would be full of cool events and no one would dig to much into my psyche.

In case the ECB's board of selectors are interested I would like to confirm that I am available if required and can start the job immeadiatley.

There are some institutions that shouldn't be messed with.  As Laurence Binyon would say; 'Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.'  They're the things that allow us in these barren years of labour government, with society falling apart at the very seams, hold up our heads and remember there will always be an England.

The Times of London was one such institution.  When you bought it, you weren't just opening your morning paper you were making a stand against the crude vulgarity of the red tops, you were in your own way doing your bit for civilisation.

Then came the compact edition, closely followed by free dvd give aways, marketing ploys, once I even saw a full front page pic of Liza Minelli in Cabaret. Slowly but surely the things that made The Times that cut above the rest were eroded away.  I still love the institution, I still think they have the best cricket coverage, great reportage, etc, it just doesn't seem to be quite so grand anymore, less than the sum of it's parts.  

Yesterday saw the most ghastly example of this yet, the example that saw me pic up my Times to buy it then put it down in disgust and refuse.  Yes, they let Katie 'Jordan' Price write for them.  Not only did they let her contribute but they felt the need to brag about this on the front cover of the paper.  I was black affronted.  

I couldn't quite believe it, it's symptomatic of our society where everything has to pander to the lowest common denominator.  Jordan is inescapable enough as it is, to the extent that I'd already been having a moan with the Waterstone's staff about the fact that they moved the Shakespeare section to make way for multiple copies of her books.  Now I can't even turn to my newspaper to escape her, because apparently stripping naked to turn men on for a living now qualifies you to replace Shakespeare and to write for The Times.

It seems that The Times is joining the avalanche of other media outlets swan diving downwards to appeal to chavus-neanderthalus and so I ask you to join with me and mourn the passing of The Times of London. 

There are somethings that press my buttons, there are some things that make me a little peevish and there are some things that make me want to expand my chest, burst hulk like from my shirt and go around throwing cars at buildings for fun.  The pulling of the new Mr T advert from television screens fall firmly in the latter section.  

It's been pulled because apparently it's offensive to gays.  Well, guess what if you take jokes seriously then they're all offensive to someone or other, doctors, lawyers, postmen, every joke has a punchline, grow up and get used to it.

Even more annoying is the fact that the advert has been pulled because of complaints from the USA, even though it's never been shown there.  The advert is not explicitly making fun of gay people, it's making fun of speed walkers. Yes, the man looks like a stereotype of what people may view as "gay" but as it's gay rights groups who've called attention to it all they're doing is perpetuating their own negative stereotype.  Not only that but have they any idea how many more people will now have to view this on youTube?  I didn't even know there was a new Mr T advert until I saw this in the paper.

Since when did the right not to be offended become a basic human right? It isn't, it can't be and frankly a world where you couldn't say anything that could offend someone would be not only very, very quiet but very, very dull.

Could we please have some sense of perspective?  Oscar Wilde was sent to jail for being gay, Alan Turing was pumped full of so many female hormones that he grew breasts and was driven to suicide.  That is prejudice and persecution.  The advert, on the other hand is a joke.  Surely it's far more offensive to say that it's offensive to gays because it's suggesting that all gay people conform to that stereotype and no gay people can take a joke.

What are your favourite first sentences from books? Is there a book that you liked specially because of its first sentence? Or a book, perhaps that you didn’t like but still remember simply because of the first line?

From Booking Through Thursday (yes it's friday but I'm late, k?)

I think the most memorable first line is probably "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times." I haven't even read the book yet and I know it, I must say it's quite exceptional.  Dickens must have been very good at this as I also remember "Marley was dead to begin with".  They're not really my favourites so much as the ones that first spring to mind.  Like Violet, I'm not sure I have a favourite, at least not one that I remember by heart.

I find the first sentence is always the hardest when I'm writing, I feel like it should grab the attention but not over state itself.  The first sentence of my novel isn't a strong one - I find it over dramatic but at the same time it was where I wanted to start the tale so I've stuck with it.  I quite like the first sentence of the short story I'm working on, called November Tenth.  "I was thirty six years old when I fell in love for the first and only time."  I think I like the simplicity of it, it's not dramatic or using any literary devices, in fact it's quite bland and plain and a starting point - it's simple but most importantly it's true to my narrator's voice.

I guess it's a little odd, really, I don't remember many first sentences and yet at the same time I think they're important.  I think the main importance not in being memorable but in attracting you in, often in a store people might read the first page or so to get a feel for a book - a weak first sentence could be a bad first impression.

        Block, block, block
        At the foot of thy wicket, O Scotton!
        And I would that my tongue would utter
        My boredom. You won't put the pot on!

        Oh, nice for the bowler, my boy,
        That each ball like a barndoor you play!
        Oh, nice for yourself, I suppose,
        That you stick at the wicket all day!

        And the clock's slow hands go on,
        And you still keep up your sticks;
        But oh! for the lift of a smiting hand,
        And the sound of a swipe for six!

        Block, block, block,
        At the foot of thy wicket, ah do!
        But one hour of Grace or Walter Read
        Were worth a week of you!

A satirical poem from Punch after a long defensive innings from Willaim Scotton.  With 6 wickets down already today, I think we could do with a Scotton, or a mammoth performance from Freddie and Stu because I don't hold much hope for the tail..